It’s really all so sad, the death of Anna Nichol Smith. I can hardly drag myself out of bed. As a matter of fact, I believe that was the case with her 2nd husband, J. Howard Marshall II, who was a mere 89 when he wed poor Anna in 1994. See their happy wedding photo above.
I dare anyone, anywhere, even those with the purest of hearts to tell me with a straight face that this was a match made from love. And I don’t mean love of big tits and hundreds of millions of dollars. I mean the romantic kind of love, the kind that makes you feel giddy when you're with that someone special and miserable as soon as your honey dares look at another person, where you have trouble being away from your beloved for more than a few minutes. In view of the fact that poor Anna Nichol took off for a vacation WITHOUT J. Ho on their wedding night, I’m a’thinking that she was not feeling the sting of Cupid's arrow.
But what about J. Howard? What about his feelings and intentions? We’re all so quick to jump to conclusions about Anna being a gold-digger, which very well may be dead-on correct. But so what? Let’s say we’re all right; Anna Nichol was in it for nothing but the money. What is so bad about this if poor old J. Ho was also aware of Anna’s motives and was a-okay with kanoodling with a young, hot 26 year old gold-digger in return for a few unneeded assets? What the hell was he going to do, at the age of 89, with $1.6 BILLION dollars anyway? If anyone is entitled to some fun and to enjoy the spoils of his labor, it’s this old schnook who was on death’s door while sitting on an incredible fortune. For Christ’s sake, once Anna came along, J. Ho got to live THE DREAM; having a Playboy Playmate of the year as his little cuddle bunny and loving spouse.
Granted, J. Ho no doubt could have gotten a lot more bang for his buck, so to speak, had he done a little more comparison shopping. (There’s gotta be a website like Froogle for gold-diggers, and if there isn’t, well there needs to be to protect mega-millionaires everywhere.) But what difference would saving 10 or 20 million make at this point, other than to his heirs. J. Ho landed a hot one, and he didn’t care if he paid full sticker price.
But why is this story, and the many others like it, still so creepy and bothersome? One reason is because J.Ho IS creepy, or at least, creepy looking. And when sitting next to a hot, young Playboy bunny, well, he looks even creepier still. (Happy as hell, but still creepy.)
Of course it goes beyond just appearances. Other than the creep factor (him), and the jealousy factor (us guys who would have loved to kannoodle some with Anna N), and the miscellaneous righteous indignation (most women) about some hussy getting a ton of money just because she’s got some rather distinguished characteristics, what really lies at the heart of all the tsk, tsking is that many of us guys see a little bit of ourselves in J. Ho, and I for one, am none too pleased at what I see.
Its not that we can’t be with Anna, as we never expected to be; its not that our moral code is so strong that we can’t bear to see someone taken advantage of. No, what I find so troubling here is that in this really creepy old man with the hot, huge-titted bunny wife, I can maybe see myself in the future when I too am just a creepy looking old guy who no decent looking woman wants to look at, let alone touch, and with no hope of having a hot chick look my way ever again. EVER.
Face it, if you were in the support shoes of J. Howard Marshall II, wouldn’t you have been tempted to say fuck it all and live your last few days and months with Anna Nichol, even if you knew that when she gazed into your cataract-riddled eyes, all she saw were dollar signs?
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For the record, J. Ho died with an estate worth $1.6 billion; a Texas state court ruled that Anna was NOT entitled to receive anything from the estate. A Calif. bankruptcy court subsequently determined that she was entitled to $475 million, an award that was later reduced to$88.5 million in damages from the now deceased stepson of J.Ho. These last decisions were recently overturned by the U.S. Supreme Court, God love'm, which returned the matter to federal court where it stands now.
Granted, J. Ho no doubt could have gotten a lot more bang for his buck, so to speak, had he done a little more comparison shopping. (There’s gotta be a website like Froogle for gold-diggers, and if there isn’t, well there needs to be to protect mega-millionaires everywhere.) But what difference would saving 10 or 20 million make at this point, other than to his heirs. J. Ho landed a hot one, and he didn’t care if he paid full sticker price.
But why is this story, and the many others like it, still so creepy and bothersome? One reason is because J.Ho IS creepy, or at least, creepy looking. And when sitting next to a hot, young Playboy bunny, well, he looks even creepier still. (Happy as hell, but still creepy.)
Of course it goes beyond just appearances. Other than the creep factor (him), and the jealousy factor (us guys who would have loved to kannoodle some with Anna N), and the miscellaneous righteous indignation (most women) about some hussy getting a ton of money just because she’s got some rather distinguished characteristics, what really lies at the heart of all the tsk, tsking is that many of us guys see a little bit of ourselves in J. Ho, and I for one, am none too pleased at what I see.
Its not that we can’t be with Anna, as we never expected to be; its not that our moral code is so strong that we can’t bear to see someone taken advantage of. No, what I find so troubling here is that in this really creepy old man with the hot, huge-titted bunny wife, I can maybe see myself in the future when I too am just a creepy looking old guy who no decent looking woman wants to look at, let alone touch, and with no hope of having a hot chick look my way ever again. EVER.
Face it, if you were in the support shoes of J. Howard Marshall II, wouldn’t you have been tempted to say fuck it all and live your last few days and months with Anna Nichol, even if you knew that when she gazed into your cataract-riddled eyes, all she saw were dollar signs?
-------------------------------------------------------------------
For the record, J. Ho died with an estate worth $1.6 billion; a Texas state court ruled that Anna was NOT entitled to receive anything from the estate. A Calif. bankruptcy court subsequently determined that she was entitled to $475 million, an award that was later reduced to$88.5 million in damages from the now deceased stepson of J.Ho. These last decisions were recently overturned by the U.S. Supreme Court, God love'm, which returned the matter to federal court where it stands now.
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